A social experiment

Social media is a hamster wheel, I’ve come to realize. A lot of momentum going nowhere and noise saying nothing substantive. Everything good found online is wasted through having no space to enter our being to affect a lasting change. Yeah it’s a lot of interesting tidbits and shocking revelations but it’s revealing that the first thing we think to do when we come across such gems is to share with as many people as possible or wonder why more people are not aware of it. When we learn of atrocities our go-to response is : how can we make this float to the top so that it has maximum visibility? We pass the buck to the digital elite who’ve accrued a substantial following because we think they did so by merit and prestige and surely they would be able to shake things up to make people do stuff, right?

Another worrying assumption; that followers is something achieved by the followed. As if thousands or millions of individuals that made that choice for infinitely varying reasons are all an extension of the followed and that they did so because of some criteria that they excelled in. As if people use logic and ethics to make choices. As if “influencers” don’t actively seek out followers by carving out a niche casting wide nets to catch roaming people in search of somewhere to dull down and someone to defer to. It’s akin to driftwood and the mechanics of tidal waves. We’re just bobbing on the waves and claiming the ocean is our private chauffeur.

Character matters more than content because most things on earth and the nature of life is such that you need to be capable of transforming stuff to benefit from them. Food and medicine and utilities aren’t found strewn around. They are made from ingredients and material that contain transformative essences. The internet is going to be a major impediment because it has successfully deluded us into thinking that we’re effective because of our overestimation of busy work and actions.


In this age of hyper consumerism, people start to sell their integrity and loosening the structure of their soul to fund their wave riding and adapting to the flighty masses moved by deep impulses and whims. Attention is the credit we pay with when our circumstances don’t allow us to be present in the conditions we crave.

Instagram is a perpetual Black Friday sale, a black hole that sucks the souls of people with restless minds. I don’t want to say we’re doomed, but hold tight. It’s gon be a wild ride.

Quit Stalin

The ego is the biggest coward. All these celebrities, people in power, wealthy people, i. e. the “elite” acquire and hunger for fame and power to protect their fragile self-image. When you got money or desired beauty or power, you don’t need courage. You don’t need to face fear. You just recreate reality to make yourself look good, and that always, always comes at the expense of needing others to look bad, i. e. the ubiquitous “haterz”. You don’t need values or principles as long as you got social capital.

It’s so insidious, this worship of materialism and inability to see humanity’s potential beyond consumption. If there were no consumers, what would the elite do? Nazi Germany anyone? The British Empire? Stalin?

If you can’t make people eat and drink to death in hedonism, suppress and torture them to death.

Real shit to keep in mind for 2017

I aint a conspiracy nut, but listen. My INFJ senses be firing off. Don’t tell me I didn’t let you know.


  1. The internet isn’t a  meritocracy. Stop asking why someone who’s good at whatever they do isn’t more known/doesn’t have a bigger following than someone who’s mediocre but more famous. Integrity, creativity and courage doesn’t do well with algorithms and tags.

  2. Realize that social media isn’t a reality. It’s virtual reality curated by you. Meaning, you searched for ideas or people based on impulses you got. You thought up a clever/witty username to stand out in the crowd, you processed your thoughts to create statuses that’d garner the most reactions. Everyone and everything on social media is a direct response to you. You’re a virtual deity. But don’t deceive yourself into thinking the world is confined to your passwords.

  3. Change doesn’t need numbers. It needs focus. Focus needs purpose and passion. Not trends on twitter and reblogs.

  4. What would you do if you had no access to internet for an entire month? How would you react? What would you do with your time for that whole month?

  5. 2017 is going to be the beginning of a turbulent era. An era of darkness and ignorance. It’s not going to be such because of some extraordinary evil force, but because majority of mankind are dazed  and addicted to social media. Do yourself a favour this coming year and wean yourself off social media before it’s too late.

  6. Think about it: social media is our real addiction, and we’re in a codependent relationship with people of status – celebrities, high ranking politicians,activists. They tend to have narcissistic tendencies, and that’s how they are able to survive at such high altitudes. Altitudes that no compassionate, thinking, feeling human being should thrive at. They do it because they aren’t those things. They know it because they used all the sick people as stepping stones. Our weakness is their power. We promise them a devout following if they promise to please us.

  7. Social media is based on erasing critical thinking, personal boundaries, self-esteem and self-empowerment. Instead of basing decisions on personal conviction and value, one bases it on the probability of getting the most amount of likes and exposure. What does the majority respond to? Whatever it is, it aint the truth.

  8. For a while, things are going to seem very, very lonely. You’ll think the whole world is in disarray, your idols don’t have a clue and you don’t know what to do. Don’t worry. What you’re feeling is the dissolution of an old paradigm that has been eroding humanity and nature for way too long, and it’s going to get uncomfortable BUT it’s just a phase. Befriend solitude. It’s scary but extremely rewarding.

  9. Learn to find the calm in the storm, because there’s going to be plenty of those.

  10. History repeats itself. Many have gone through the shifts we’re experiencing. The discomfort of dissolution has given birth to visionaries who’ve fortunately left behind a huge trail of books. You’ll find solace in writers.

  11. Don’t look for the world to feed you. The world has fed you long enough. It needs you now. So feed off your own power, stand by your own support, be comforted by your own voice.

  12. What happens in the external realm is just an extension of the inner. It’s just a symptom of a deeper ailment. Don’t waste your energy firing off at Trump or climate change. Look within and sever the roots this corrupt tree has grown in you.  Then grow your own tree of self-awareness. That’s how you can help humanity evolve past destruction, in the long run.


A Sincere Fool

In my journey to finding my place in this world and sharing myself with it, with all of you, there are times when my vulnerability brings me to people who are overcoming with an urgent need to just hurt me, to shut me up. Sharing something vulnerable with the world is unnerving on its own, but to then have people mock you or try to hurt you by using what they see as a weak spot, it’s so incredibly painful. Not least because you could have prevented that by not opening up to start with! Almost as if life is taunting me with a big neon sign that spells ‘ I told you so!’.

Such one moment happened to me earlier today. I’m no stranger to backlash and trolling, but this time it was significantly different. It was calculated. Without going into details, I was shocked. Gutted. I started crying. The story I had shared, that this person used to hurt me with, was one of the most painful stories of my life, and I felt so helpless when I was attacked. My usual boldness and bravado didn’t hold up. I didn’t even try because the pain was electrifying and it seared through all layers of me. I didn’t know what to do. I was faced with so much pain, and I didn’t want to stay exposed. My knee-jerk reaction was to delete everything, stop sharing of myself, and deactivate my facebook. I wanted to run away, far away. Contrary to how I may appear, I hate being seen by people. If I could have my way, I’d be a hermit in a cabin by a lake. It’s easier to be anonymous than to be misunderstood. Every time I write something or post something, alarm bells go off in my head. And I hit snooze every single time. I choose to be present in the battlefield, fear and pain be damned! All those fears and alarm bells came raining down on me in a torrent of self-consciousness and regret. Why oh why oh why oh why! *You’re fooling yourself into thinking that your writing makes any difference ! You are so stupid and naive !!!*

A calm voice pushed up from beneath the sea of chaos that was taking over me. It reminded me that I should stay in this moment, and just feel the pain. “Own it – this moment, these feelings, this pain. Acknowledge it. Cry it out. It’s going to be ok. There’s no shame in what you did. You can’t control what people will think of you or do to you. There’s always the risk of being hurt. That’s the rent you pay for your place in this world.”

These words embraced me from within and I felt calm, albeit tired, the way the earth briefly holds the rain water after the rain stops, before it’s absorbed into its core. A moment of stillness after the clamour of raindrops beating against windows and rooftops stops.

As the chaos ebbed away, there was a newfound purpose in its wake; a renewed intention to tip the scale of this world in favour of the powerless. I had felt the fear, felt the pain of humiliation and mockery surge through me, and that meant that I was free. I didn’t have to live out my days locking it inside the deepest recesses of my mind, patrolling it so it didn’t come out.

I decided to go right back to the battlefield where my spilt blood had mixed with the rainwater. It formed a small pool of murky water that reflected the sky that had cleared of the rain clouds. I looked at the sky mirrored in the puddle, and I saw strength looking back at me.

“There’s nothing more efficient than honesty and nothing more powerful than vulnerability because, vulnerability reveals everyone in your life who will abuse power immediately and almost irrevocably.

There’s nothing weaker than hiding your vulnerability because, it means a refusal to stare at those who abuse power and see them for who they are which means they still have power and control over you. Nothing is stronger than vulnerability. Nothing more clarifying. Nothing is clearer than vulnerability, and if you hide who you are you are just making a tombstone of your everyday actions because you dont exist in hiding and you’re letting the past rob you.

Exercise the power of vulnerability. When you are vulnerable you are signaling to your system that the past is over and done! That you’re no longer a victim! That you’re no longer trapped in a destructive and abusive environment! Vulnerability means it’s over, it’s done. The war is over but, if you continue to use the same defenses that you had in the past all you’re telling your whole body is that the past is not over.

Be vulnerable. Be honest. Be open and show your heart. That’s the best way of telling your heart that the tigers are no longer in the grass. I’m telling you, just take it for a spin. Vulnerability and openness will get you what you want in your life and hiding will only get you the feeling of being prey from here until the end of your life.”

― Stefan Molyneux

Whilst the world is on hold

For nearly a week now I’ve been off facebook to regain my focus. I felt my energy was scattered all over, and that I had neglected myself. In the time since, I’ve been in a near-constant state of flow where time and space ceased to be. I’ve been devouring books in ways I haven’t in over a decade. Below are some of the books I’ve read (either entirely or partially) this past week:


The social media recluse

I’m what I call a ‘selective recluse’. I live in my own,isolated corner of society and only come out to mingle when something catches my attention that is sweeter than my solitude. I left Facebook in 2011 when I realized that it had run its course; in the beginning,when I signed up, it was vibrant and alive. People were actually human beings and not just ‘account holders’. A ‘like’ actually meant a like. There were no follow-bait or click-bait where people do anything to get noticed. Then this need, this lowly egotistical darkness took over. It started out as a tiny blot in the caveats of our flawed human nature, as part and parcel of flaws that makes us beautiful and humble. The flaws and imperfections that teach us how to love, that kind of flawed.

But then this need I mentioned, it took on a life of its own. It grew like a cancerous cell that permeated the human element and turned everything into shiny surfaces that looked good. Nothing grows on shiny  surfaces. No warmth, no kindness,no empathy. So this thing, this vain monster became the pivotal point around which society circumvoluted; everything was now based on this decadent trend. You look yourself in the mirror and all you see is how selfie-ready you look like, how many likes you could garner – how to make yourself forget that you’re a human with flaws. So then, arrogance and haughtiness enters the picture. You look down on anyone who doesn’t look like selfie-material. Essentially, flawed,mistake-prone,warm,loving,hurting,laughing human beings – the way a human is supposed to be sans the whole facade of perfection and glamour.

You see someone in need and the first instinct is to make fun of the person on twitter. You see a dying person and the first thing you do is instagram it and tell others how you were there. Life unfolds in front of you and you never process it, you don’t really experience it. It gets lost in the countless statuses and tweets that are all about the limelight.

There are wars erupting, a deadly virus pandemic looming over us, a sinister elite who push the envelope to advance its interests; but the capacity to bear the brunt of these events and let it stir emotions in us; compassion,grief,anger – anything, is numbed. It was obliterated by that shiny surface.

How can we practice compassion for others when we are constantly critiquing ourselves and judging our worth by our social media presence? How can we be concerned about the turmoil and disturbances going on around us when we are trying so hard to ignore our inner turmoil?

What’s going on in the world is a reflection of what is going on inside of each and every one of us. We aren’t all that different. Language barriers and borders only act as physical boundaries, but we are bound by our collective psyche.

Now, I’m not saying that being on social media is reflective of one’s egotism or that being conscientious entails being a recluse like me. Not at all. I’m a recluse because I’m very sensitive and get overwhelmed easily, so my interests are inclined away from clamour. I’m sure if I wasn’t as easily perturbed, that I’d partake in it, in one form or another. But it’s by being on the outside that I can analyse this phenomenon somewhat objectively. I don’t think social media created this mess, it merely brought it out. So it’s not about changing venues or stop taking selfies; it’s about something deeper whence all of this is stemming from. That is what we should investigate in ourselves.

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