Outstripping the sky

Before you attempt to change what you see, change the way you perceive your feelings towards the outside world. Often, we externalize an inner resistance or conflict because it seems easier to tackle a problem that’s concrete and malleable, than to delve inwards. We think that if we change the circumstances that make us feel uncomfortable, insecure or unsafe then those feelings will automatically dissolve. But what we find is that we simply move into a new house with our old stuff, recreating the scenarios every time.

قُلْ إِنِّي لَن يُجِيرَنِي مِنَ اللَّهِ أَحَدٌ وَلَنْ أَجِدَ مِن دُونِهِ مُلْتَحَدًا

Say, “Indeed, there will never protect me from Allah anyone [if I should disobey], nor will I find in other than Him a refuge.

[al-Jinn:22]

The truth breaks the hypnosis of illusions

Surrendering to Allaah entails that you refuse to surrender or succumb to any other reality, construct or condition.

Hopelessness is caused by a subtle shirk of attributing effect to a confounding circumstance, instead of Allaah.

يَا بَنِيَّ اذْهَبُوا فَتَحَسَّسُوا مِن يُوسُفَ وَأَخِيهِ وَلَا تَيْأَسُوا مِن رَّوْحِ اللَّهِ إِنَّهُ لَا يَيْأَسُ مِن رَّوْحِ اللَّهِ إِلَّا الْقَوْمُ الْكَافِرُونَ

O my sons, go and find out about Joseph and his brother and despair not of relief from Allah. Indeed, no one despairs of relief from Allah except the disbelieving people.”

[Yusuf:87]

I affirm the wahdaaniyya (وحدانية) of Allaah in the depths of my existential depression and the threatening darkness around me. I ask Allaah to make firm in my heart the certainty that divine relief is coming.

The void has ears

I can’t protect myself and I can’t advance myself. I can’t control my feelings or the feelings of others. This is the great existential threat that I have been tirelessly toiling against since my teens, trying to control and predict my world so that I could be safe. Of course, I didn’t want to cut straight to the chase and leave the whole simulation I was born into and conditioned to run on. I didn’t think I could survive that level of intense confrontation.

I didn’t know Allaah, intrinsically.

He’s protected me from annihilation even in the midst of extreme distress and trauma. He’s advanced my understanding by quantum leaps despite me not being in a state of mind where I could devote myself to studying.

And now I’ve come to the precipice of my existential battlefield and though I have no proof of what lies beyond, or if something lies beyond this for that matter, I have an intuitive feeling to go for what magnetizes me and not fear the doubts that crop up because my departure and my safe landing is but a creation of Allaah’s.

وَقَالَ ٱرْكَبُوا۟ فِيهَا بِسْمِ ٱللَّهِ مَجْر۪ىٰهَا وَمُرْسَىٰهَآ إِنَّ رَبِّى لَغَفُورٌ رَّحِيمٌ

And he [Nuh] said: “Embark therein, in the Name of Allah will be its moving course and its resting anchorage. Surely, my Lord is Oft-Forgiving, Most Merciful.”

[Hud:41]

The acorn is still the heart of the oak tree

There’s no situation that isn’t created and sustained by Allaah. If you don’t get what you’re anxiously seeking, it’s not because the bitter boss sabotaged you or the person you wanted to marry rejected you. It’s simply that Allaah willfully and benevolently didn’t place your rizq there. Your need won’t go unmet. It’ll simply be redirected to a higher and more abundant good. Allaah never deprives. He never distorts. He never reduces except by our heart reducing in turning away from Him and His abundance. He never creates disorder. He never obscures. He never makes things difficult or complex. Everything He creates is impeccable, good, balanced and expansive. It’s Love; something you’ll only be able to internalize once you let go of the faulty worldview based on a lack mentality and a dominance of evil.

مَّا يَفْعَلُ ٱللَّهُ بِعَذَابِكُمْ إِن شَكَرْتُمْ وَءَامَنتُمْ وَكَانَ ٱللَّهُ شَاكِرًا عَلِيمًا

What would Allah do with your punishment if you are grateful and believe? And ever is Allah Appreciative and Knowing.

[an-Nisaa:147]

Third eye

I’m actually not the least bit interested in possessing knowledge nor do I have any goals or outcomes in mind. I focus all my energy on unveiling my divine purpose and experiencing true awareness of Allaah and the cosmos. Silent knowledge. The knowledge felt in the heart not the one stored in the mind. I don’t care for following preset guidelines or rules in order to make my messages easier to digest or understand. My writing is a direct transcription of my feelings and intuition. I only write to bring down 5D content and ground it in my body, in this physical realm so that I’m not imbalanced. Also, I wish to be of service to the causes and people that I get spontaneously inspired and directed by the divine. I don’t want to dwell on anything. I want to keep my heart clear at all times so that I can remain mindful and with clear perception. That’s all that matters to me. To be able to see clearly. I’ll sacrifice my all to attain that. I don’t want to be the reason why I’m blind to the divine love and light. This world would be a pure hell if I couldn’t feel and see Allaah’s presence. I always always always ask Allaah to not leave me to my own devices, and to envelop me in His grace and protection. I don’t ever want to put my will above His.

وَيْلٌ يَوْمَئِذٍ لِّلْمُكَذِّبِينَ

Woe that Day, to the deniers

ٱلَّذِينَ يُكَذِّبُونَ بِيَوْمِ ٱلدِّينِ

Those who deny the Day of Recompense

وَمَا يُكَذِّبُ بِهِۦٓ إِلَّا كُلُّ مُعْتَدٍ أَثِيمٍ

And none deny it except every sinful transgressor.

إِذَا تُتْلَىٰ عَلَيْهِ ءَايَٰتُنَا قَالَ أَسَٰطِيرُ ٱلْأَوَّلِينَ

When Our Verses (of the Quran) are recited to him he says: “Tales of the ancients!”

كَلَّا بَلْ رَانَ عَلَىٰ قُلُوبِهِم مَّا كَانُوا۟ يَكْسِبُونَ

No! Rather, the stain has covered their hearts of that which they were earning.

كَلَّآ إِنَّهُمْ عَن رَّبِّهِمْ يَوْمَئِذٍ لَّمَحْجُوبُونَ

Nay! Surely, they (evil-doers) will be veiled from seeing their Lord that Day.

ثُمَّ إِنَّهُمْ لَصَالُوا۟ ٱلْجَحِيمِ

Then verily they will indeed enter and taste the burning flame of Hell.

ثُمَّ يُقَالُ هَٰذَا ٱلَّذِى كُنتُم بِهِۦ تُكَذِّبُونَ

Then it will be said [to them], “This is what you used to deny.”

[al-Mutaffifeen:10-17]

Only what’s gentle is consistent

To think about it, the onset of day and night could have been abrupt ; the transition from day to night and vice versa could have been like the flick of a switch. But Allaah eases us into it through the dusk and dawn. That’s love. He could just slap us with the reality and truth and been like, deal with it. But no. He loves us through the process so that we don’t struggle. He never imposes Himself. The fact that people dispute His existence and truth while taking full advantage of what He’s created shows the extent of His love and that He doesn’t use His power to enslave us, though He could and would be in full right to.

وَقَالَ ٱلَّذِينَ كَفَرُوا۟ لَوْلَا نُزِّلَ عَلَيْهِ ٱلْقُرْءَانُ جُمْلَةً وَٰحِدَةً كَذَٰلِكَ لِنُثَبِّتَ بِهِۦ فُؤَادَكَ وَرَتَّلْنَٰهُ تَرْتِيلًا

And those who disbelieve say: “Why is not the Quran revealed to him all at once?” Thus (it is sent down in parts), that We may strengthen your heart thereby. And We have revealed it to you gradually, in stages.

[al-Furqaan:32]

Those without love for the Truth demand it out of defiance. But a heart that doesn’t hold love first can’t receive the truth. You can’t receive the message if you don’t love the one dispatching the message. This is why dogma, fanaticism, and absolutism is detrimental to one’s faith. The truth is too powerful and unlimited to try to grasp all at once. People act as if feelings don’t matter in the face of the truth, that one should set the human nature aside to act as a sterile vessel but that’s missing the point entirely. Allaah loves to love. He loves to have mercy, to help, to guide, to support, to be there for us. It’s in His essence. We’re weak and imperfect because we need love. His love and any offshoot from that through His creation. If truth is the goal, love is the process.

Sparkles

Nothing has ever weighed as heavy on me as having to accept what Allaah decreed my life to be.

🌸

I think this is because it forced me out of my complacency with the state of the world and my pain is a river that inevitably flows into the sea that is the collective unconscious of humanity. I could no longer be comfortably numb or hide behind illusions and fantasies. I had to go into hell to rescue my soul from the devil. I had to go into the belly of the beast, the eye of the storm, the apex of confusion to be released from all of that. To transcend it all I had to sacrifice everything that protected me from it. And the interval between letting go and seeing the truth of what I’ve been following intuitively feels like an eternity. Being suspended like that while the egregious thoughtforms and fear do their absolute best in trying to reel me back in feels like having my skin peeled off. Over and over and over again until I’d ask when will this be over? Will it ever be over?

أَمْ حَسِبْتُمْ أَن تَدْخُلُواْ الْجَنَّةَ وَلَمَّا يَأْتِكُم مَّثَلُ الَّذِينَ خَلَوْاْ مِن قَبْلِكُم مَّسَّتْهُمُ الْبَأْسَاء وَالضَّرَّاء وَزُلْزِلُواْ حَتَّى يَقُولَ الرَّسُولُ وَالَّذِينَ آمَنُواْ مَعَهُ مَتَى نَصْرُ اللّهِ أَلا إِنَّ نَصْرَ اللّهِ قَرِيبٌ

Or think you that you will enter Paradise without such (trials) as came to those who passed away before you? They were afflicted with severe poverty and ailments and were so shaken that even the Messenger and those who believed along with him said, “When (will come) the Help of Allaah?” Yes! Certainly, the Help of Allaah is near!

[Al-Baqarah:214]

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