A privilege

I just realized that it wasn’t until Ya’Qub alayhissalaam’s second favourite son was taken that the trial came to a closure. Also, this is parallel to his grandfather Ibraaheem alayhissalaam who was tried with his two sons (one being Is’haaq, the father of Ya’Qub) one of whom he had to abandon and the other one kill (again, similar to the killing claimed for Yusuf and the abandonment of Benjamin in Egypt).

وَإِذِ ٱبْتَلَىٰٓ إِبْرَٰهِۦمَ رَبُّهُۥ بِكَلِمَٰتٍ فَأَتَمَّهُنَّ قَالَ إِنِّى جَاعِلُكَ لِلنَّاسِ إِمَامًا قَالَ وَمِن ذُرِّيَّتِى قَالَ لَا يَنَالُ عَهْدِى ٱلظَّٰلِمِينَ

And [mention, O Muhammad], when Abraham was tried by his Lord with commands and he fulfilled them. [Allah] said, “Indeed, I will make you a leader for the people.” [Abraham] said, “And of my descendants?” [Allah] said, “My covenant does not include the wrongdoers.”

[al-Baqarah:124]

I’m amazed that I never saw that. And my mind is always trying to find connections and patterns. But this one just popped into my mind. Allaah will reveal what He wants whenever He wants and it’s not a matter of vigilance or effort. SubhaanAllaah.

Surrender convention

Dikr is meditation that not only takes you out of the mental space but into your heart space. Its effect is instantaneous because encapsulated in the prophetic phrases is a space in which you can completely let go of the hypervigilance of being in a 3D world focused on survival, danger and scarcity. It allows you to become vulnerable without feeling threatened and to inhabit the unknown deep in you without feeling lost.

Dikr is feminine energy ; it’s Being, stillness, silencing thoughts, transcending ego, awareness, intuition, but above all LOVE.

One example :

لا إِلَهَ إِلا اللَّهُ وَحْدَهُ لا شَرِيكَ لَهُ لَهُ الْمُلْكُ وَلَهُ الْحَمْدُ وَهُوَ عَلَى كُلِّ شَيْءٍ قَدِيرٌ

There is no true deity but Allaah alone, no partners has He. His is all sovereignty and praise, and He is over all things potent

The heart longs to surrender and we often surrender it to our minds which confines and suffocates and treat it very harshly. Only Allaah has the abundance and transcends all limitations to give us the true confidence to let go of control. By reiterating this, we recalibrate ourselves to the divine reality and take back the balance from a hectic and frantic outer reality that can obscure the possibility of anything else.

It is by reminding ourselves of our humanity that we can receive the divine. But for as long as we’re frantically trying to conquer this space of surrender by constant doing and being overly steeped in masculine energy that overwhelms us, we are incapable of receiving harmony and love no matter how much we think we want it. The underlying identification with perfectionism and outcomes has with it a deep fear of losing yourself if you slow down.

فَلَمَّا جَآءَتْ قِيلَ أَهَٰكَذَا عَرْشُكِ قَالَتْ كَأَنَّهُۥ هُوَ وَأُوتِينَا ٱلْعِلْمَ مِن قَبْلِهَا وَكُنَّا مُسْلِمِينَ

So when she arrived, it was said [to her], “Is your throne like this?” She said, “[It is] as though it was it.” [Solomon said], “And we were given knowledge before her, and we have been Muslims [in submission to Allah]

وَصَدَّهَا مَا كَانَت تَّعْبُدُ مِن دُونِ ٱللَّهِ إِنَّهَا كَانَتْ مِن قَوْمٍ كَٰفِرِينَ

And that which she was worshipping other than Allah had averted her [from submission to Him]. Indeed, she was from a disbelieving people.

قِيلَ لَهَا ٱدْخُلِى ٱلصَّرْحَ فَلَمَّا رَأَتْهُ حَسِبَتْهُ لُجَّةً وَكَشَفَتْ عَن سَاقَيْهَا قَالَ إِنَّهُۥ صَرْحٌ مُّمَرَّدٌ مِّن قَوَارِيرَ قَالَتْ رَبِّ إِنِّى ظَلَمْتُ نَفْسِى وَأَسْلَمْتُ مَعَ سُلَيْمَٰنَ لِلَّهِ رَبِّ ٱلْعَٰلَمِينَ

It was said to her: “Enter As-Sarh” [(a glass surface with water underneath it) or a palace], but when she saw it, she thought it was a pool, and she (tucked up her clothes) uncovering her legs, Sulaiman (Solomon) said: “Verily, it is Sarh [(a glass surface with water underneath it) or a palace] paved smooth with slab of glass.” She said: “My Lord! Verily, I have wronged myself, and I submit (in Islam, together with Sulaiman (Solomon), to Allah, the Lord of the ‘Alamin (mankind, jinns and all that exists).”

[an-Naml:42-44]

Though she was very astute and intelligent, she had let her position and possessions and abilities cloud her from the inner space that would give her the right awareness. It wasn’t until she was met with something that exceeded far beyond any worldly structure that she decided to look inwardly. She had to reach a point where her thoughts and thinking ability gave out on her for her to tap into an inner knowing that has a far deeper and wider scope of perception than the mind can ever have.

And this is why I believe that as women, constantly being in positions that demand masculine energy is extremely detrimental to our well-being and it depletes our inner power. But that’s for another post.

Outstripping the sky

Before you attempt to change what you see, change the way you perceive your feelings towards the outside world. Often, we externalize an inner resistance or conflict because it seems easier to tackle a problem that’s concrete and malleable, than to delve inwards. We think that if we change the circumstances that make us feel uncomfortable, insecure or unsafe then those feelings will automatically dissolve. But what we find is that we simply move into a new house with our old stuff, recreating the scenarios every time.

قُلْ إِنِّي لَن يُجِيرَنِي مِنَ اللَّهِ أَحَدٌ وَلَنْ أَجِدَ مِن دُونِهِ مُلْتَحَدًا

Say, “Indeed, there will never protect me from Allah anyone [if I should disobey], nor will I find in other than Him a refuge.

[al-Jinn:22]

The truth breaks the hypnosis of illusions

Surrendering to Allaah entails that you refuse to surrender or succumb to any other reality, construct or condition.

Hopelessness is caused by a subtle shirk of attributing effect to a confounding circumstance, instead of Allaah.

يَا بَنِيَّ اذْهَبُوا فَتَحَسَّسُوا مِن يُوسُفَ وَأَخِيهِ وَلَا تَيْأَسُوا مِن رَّوْحِ اللَّهِ إِنَّهُ لَا يَيْأَسُ مِن رَّوْحِ اللَّهِ إِلَّا الْقَوْمُ الْكَافِرُونَ

O my sons, go and find out about Joseph and his brother and despair not of relief from Allah. Indeed, no one despairs of relief from Allah except the disbelieving people.”

[Yusuf:87]

I affirm the wahdaaniyya (وحدانية) of Allaah in the depths of my existential depression and the threatening darkness around me. I ask Allaah to make firm in my heart the certainty that divine relief is coming.

The void has ears

I can’t protect myself and I can’t advance myself. I can’t control my feelings or the feelings of others. This is the great existential threat that I have been tirelessly toiling against since my teens, trying to control and predict my world so that I could be safe. Of course, I didn’t want to cut straight to the chase and leave the whole simulation I was born into and conditioned to run on. I didn’t think I could survive that level of intense confrontation.

I didn’t know Allaah, intrinsically.

He’s protected me from annihilation even in the midst of extreme distress and trauma. He’s advanced my understanding by quantum leaps despite me not being in a state of mind where I could devote myself to studying.

And now I’ve come to the precipice of my existential battlefield and though I have no proof of what lies beyond, or if something lies beyond this for that matter, I have an intuitive feeling to go for what magnetizes me and not fear the doubts that crop up because my departure and my safe landing is but a creation of Allaah’s.

وَقَالَ ٱرْكَبُوا۟ فِيهَا بِسْمِ ٱللَّهِ مَجْر۪ىٰهَا وَمُرْسَىٰهَآ إِنَّ رَبِّى لَغَفُورٌ رَّحِيمٌ

And he [Nuh] said: “Embark therein, in the Name of Allah will be its moving course and its resting anchorage. Surely, my Lord is Oft-Forgiving, Most Merciful.”

[Hud:41]

The acorn is still the heart of the oak tree

There’s no situation that isn’t created and sustained by Allaah. If you don’t get what you’re anxiously seeking, it’s not because the bitter boss sabotaged you or the person you wanted to marry rejected you. It’s simply that Allaah willfully and benevolently didn’t place your rizq there. Your need won’t go unmet. It’ll simply be redirected to a higher and more abundant good. Allaah never deprives. He never distorts. He never reduces except by our heart reducing in turning away from Him and His abundance. He never creates disorder. He never obscures. He never makes things difficult or complex. Everything He creates is impeccable, good, balanced and expansive. It’s Love; something you’ll only be able to internalize once you let go of the faulty worldview based on a lack mentality and a dominance of evil.

مَّا يَفْعَلُ ٱللَّهُ بِعَذَابِكُمْ إِن شَكَرْتُمْ وَءَامَنتُمْ وَكَانَ ٱللَّهُ شَاكِرًا عَلِيمًا

What would Allah do with your punishment if you are grateful and believe? And ever is Allah Appreciative and Knowing.

[an-Nisaa:147]

Third eye

I’m actually not the least bit interested in possessing knowledge nor do I have any goals or outcomes in mind. I focus all my energy on unveiling my divine purpose and experiencing true awareness of Allaah and the cosmos. Silent knowledge. The knowledge felt in the heart not the one stored in the mind. I don’t care for following preset guidelines or rules in order to make my messages easier to digest or understand. My writing is a direct transcription of my feelings and intuition. I only write to bring down 5D content and ground it in my body, in this physical realm so that I’m not imbalanced. Also, I wish to be of service to the causes and people that I get spontaneously inspired and directed by the divine. I don’t want to dwell on anything. I want to keep my heart clear at all times so that I can remain mindful and with clear perception. That’s all that matters to me. To be able to see clearly. I’ll sacrifice my all to attain that. I don’t want to be the reason why I’m blind to the divine love and light. This world would be a pure hell if I couldn’t feel and see Allaah’s presence. I always always always ask Allaah to not leave me to my own devices, and to envelop me in His grace and protection. I don’t ever want to put my will above His.

وَيْلٌ يَوْمَئِذٍ لِّلْمُكَذِّبِينَ

Woe that Day, to the deniers

ٱلَّذِينَ يُكَذِّبُونَ بِيَوْمِ ٱلدِّينِ

Those who deny the Day of Recompense

وَمَا يُكَذِّبُ بِهِۦٓ إِلَّا كُلُّ مُعْتَدٍ أَثِيمٍ

And none deny it except every sinful transgressor.

إِذَا تُتْلَىٰ عَلَيْهِ ءَايَٰتُنَا قَالَ أَسَٰطِيرُ ٱلْأَوَّلِينَ

When Our Verses (of the Quran) are recited to him he says: “Tales of the ancients!”

كَلَّا بَلْ رَانَ عَلَىٰ قُلُوبِهِم مَّا كَانُوا۟ يَكْسِبُونَ

No! Rather, the stain has covered their hearts of that which they were earning.

كَلَّآ إِنَّهُمْ عَن رَّبِّهِمْ يَوْمَئِذٍ لَّمَحْجُوبُونَ

Nay! Surely, they (evil-doers) will be veiled from seeing their Lord that Day.

ثُمَّ إِنَّهُمْ لَصَالُوا۟ ٱلْجَحِيمِ

Then verily they will indeed enter and taste the burning flame of Hell.

ثُمَّ يُقَالُ هَٰذَا ٱلَّذِى كُنتُم بِهِۦ تُكَذِّبُونَ

Then it will be said [to them], “This is what you used to deny.”

[al-Mutaffifeen:10-17]

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