Dark rivers run deep

darkriver10

13.04.14

Within me run dark, deep rivers

Within me storms are stirred by my grief

Within me a thousand tear drops are suspended, awaiting the tide

And when the time is right, they ebb into the ocean of all dark things

Dark thoughts, dark feelings, darkness

Dwelling in the deepest recesses of me

I try to find my way out of this maze

But it seems the harder I try, the more I get lost

Sometimes it’s so dark I forget I exist

If it weren’t for the tidal waves smashing into me

Startling me awake

I would have forgotten to start breathing

If it wasn’t for the boiling volcano of anger in me

That sit somewhere between my solar plexus and infinity

That suffocates and drowns me

It burns and tears me apart

It destroys the little I accrued from the flow of hope

I fuel it by taking in all the darkness in me and letting it seep into every pore

I fall into its’ arms and let it devour me

Then suddenly, look

Hear

The eruption of the volcano

Causing a tsunami of emotions and tears to wash over me

They irrigate the deserts of my heart

and grant me the strength

To hold on to live another day.

I’m a weakling, so what?

You can’t hurt me without a written invitation from me & mine

Me & my insecurities

You can’t kill my vibe without tying my noose of fear around my neck

Pull hard

You can’t offend me without doing so politely

‘Please’ and ‘may I’

May I make you feel small and insignificant, please?

On other days I’d concede, nod and bow my head in shame

Let your hate impact me and shatter my being

But today is different. Today I-

I unsnare I unscare I unhurt I unkill I unconcede

I peel off the dirty lies

Your lies, your views, your opinions- I disrobe

and as I stand bare in nothing but my scar- and flaw -laden soul,

Your power you exerted over me cascades down

Gathers in a tiny, murky puddle at your feet

Today is different and today you see your evil reflected in that puddle

You see that your entire life is murky and insignificant

and all the hatred you spewed at me became my strength and it became your destruction

 

 

 

 

Fugitives

Where the storm settles

and rainbows lay to rest

We shall find each other in the reflection of our trapped souls

Let’s break out.

18

 

In my grave

rising-full-moon

When my planet ceases to be
and my bright stars dim
That day
That night
My moon will cry for me

∗*∗*∗
I had cast my soul away
and roamed the earth for someone else to dwell in

Like a ghost
Yes, it will cry I think
Over my frail, empty shell held together by lies
And the moon will cry because of that utter misery.

∗*∗*∗
And now that I am lying here
the tears of the moon trickle down my face

And join my own tears
but I don’t wipe them away
I gulp them
and cry
in my grave.

M.B

The Rain

Live yourself

Live in your shoes

Live yourself, if you can’t remember then pinch yourself

Hold yourself up to the light

Like a colourslide

and see your true colours so vivid

Smell yourself,

Smell your soul

Like the tarmac smells of wetness right before it’s about to rain

Let the dusk embrace you

Dawn smile in your eyes

Like lightning bolts

or  petals of orange fire

that doesn’t burn.

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