Cold rain

I think I’ve managed to boil down my genius to one thing : the ability to see what is, and to see things for what they are.

Disenchanted, spells don’t bind me, smoke doesn’t sting my eyes.

No signal reception

I guess what I’ve always been looking for is divinity in things and people. The spark, the awareness that I’m not alone in what I’m noticing. And it’s been so difficult to find it growing up in the West that has wiped clean any sign of the metaphysical or supernatural, at least in the establishment. School, books, movies, peers – everywhere I turned to I was met with this stonewalling of the divine, as if my intuition and spiritual perception was being shut down and gaslit. Not by any overt or even conscious effort, but by simply using what’s provable and what’s established by experts to gauge and guide one’s exploration and expression. And before I could even take a step I was hamstrung.

Although I decided to stop showing that side to me, it was as if it had autonomy in what it perceived and discovered. It spat right out everything I tried to shove down my own throat in a desperate attempt at fitting in. Eventually the inner conflict grew to such cataclysmic proportions that my psyche fragmented, not counting the unrelated traumas I’ve been through.

My mind is thirsting for something and the echo chambers of academia and postmodernism is like a desert to me. It’s absolutely uninspiring and not welcoming to curiosity. It has no soul and no connection to the divine whatsoever.

Only trust your intuition

We live in a time that’s highly driven by optics and the power of illusions. Fame that’s pushed by a machine that douses the algorithms with whoever they want people to fixate on, fiat money as opposed to commodity money, crypto currency, stock market that’s based on speculation, shadow governments and deep state, proxy wars, psy-ops, advertisements that deal in subliminal messaging and behaviour modification, social engineering, the entire entertainment industry, exploitation of women’s bodies, virtue signalling, false flag operations, the new age industry, law of attraction as pop-spirituality, biased news reporting, and much much more.

Imagery is hypnotic. No wonder the Prophet sallAllaahu calayhi wasallam warned against it. The world is already deceptive and illusionary as it is, imagine hijacking the mind through imagery on top of everything else?

Coordinations of my intuition

Let the depths of hell open up in me
And I’ll burn in love
I’ll no longer make room for doubt but my heart’s wisdom
The truth always takes me too far
But as long as I keep an ear to the rushing sound of my feelings

like a seashell,

I’ll always find home right where I am
Because everywhere I am, I belong

Ramadan regressions {3}

What making du’aa does is that it frees you from the stalemate between the polarities that you’ve identified with, and in that surrender you are lifted above the battleground.

 
If you identify with a state of mind or a mood or outcome, that inevitably has a dark side, a yin. So you’ll forever be fighting and attempting to exclude the onslaught of the oscillating energy, the ebb.
But if you’re released from that, you inhabit your own natural rhythm where you’re not attached to any polarity or point.  Your focus is on being grounded in your consciousness where the moment flows in and out of.
So it’s not necessarily being detached, because there’s a resistance in identifying with detachment. You’re afraid of the disappointment of things floating away, so you may take to detachment as a way to bypass that.

 
It’s not about constructing a way to eliminate suffering or betrayal. You have to understand that inner peace isn’t a fluke, and suffering isn’t a flaw. They are both points on a spectrum measuring your well-being. Inner peace isn’t meant to make you comfortable, but to let you know when you’re aligned with yourself. And suffering comes about when you’re resisting pain, because you’re misconstruing what it’s teaching you. The reason why falls and failures are integral to life is because that’s how Allaah’s will is made manifest; through the contrast between what you perceive and the truth. Failure is simply when your perception has reached its end.

 
The ultimate goal of life is this: to be humble and reliant on the guidance of Allaah, and to be of  service​ to humanity by filtering everything through love.
What does that entail? It means that your intentions are rooted in truth and your efforts are directed towards a balanced interaction with the outside world.
So it’s not so much about being all positive, in fact if your supposed positivity is rooted in a nerdiness of validation or attachment to positivity, then you’re harming yourself by being inauthentic.

 

Doing good to others isn’t gauged by the arbitrary satisfaction of others, but by the transcendent truth. So you may criticize someone or in other ways do something that is seen as negative, but because it’s rooted in your authentic expression and fight against falsehood, it’ll inevitably have a good impact. Again, this is a process refined through mindful self-awareness and an openness to being proven wrong.

It’s a fluid process that forces you to be cognizant of your capacity to be false and evil, as well as bringing down the barriers we’ve erected to keep us safe.
When we internalize an incident ( usually negatively), we’re erecting a barrier.

When we identify with people based on how they make us feel, we’re erecting a barrier.

When we dismiss something out of hand because it doesn’t seem relative, we’re erecting a barrier.

We have to revise our world view if we categorize everything to “good vibes” and “bad vibes”.

Because how would you know a good vibe if the truth, your truth, makes you so uncomfortable that you run away from yourself? How reliable are your feelings if they are disconnected from your intuition?
When we’re disconnected from our intuition, we become blind and unable to navigate an increasingly complex world where so much is happening at once. To offset the anxiety, we barricade ourselves in, we look for “safe” people , which really means familiar even if familiar is toxic, and in general, cutting down the world to fit our limited scope of understanding.

 

The intuition is a tether that allows us to explore the universe in its vastness and the human experience in its depth because ultimately our trust doesn’t lie with what’s malleable and subject to change. Our trust is in our intuition, and that in turn is connected to Allaah who created everything seen and unseen, and Who alone can inform us of what is actually good for us in the long run.

 
حِيَ إِلَى نُوحٍ أَنَّهُ لَن يُؤْمِنَ مِن قَوْمِكَ إِلاَّ مَن قَدْ آمَنَ فَلاَ تَبْتَئِسْ بِمَا كَانُواْ يَفْعَلُونَ
And it was inspired to Nuh: “None of your people will believe except those who have believed already. So be not sad because of what they used to do.

 
وَاصْنَعِ الْفُلْكَ بِأَعْيُنِنَا وَوَحْيِنَا وَلاَ تُخَاطِبْنِي فِي الَّذِينَ ظَلَمُواْ إِنَّهُم مُّغْرَقُونَ
And construct the ship under Our Eyes and with Our Inspiration, and address Me not on behalf of those who did wrong; they are surely to be drowned.”

 
وَيَصْنَعُ الْفُلْكَ وَكُلَّمَا مَرَّ عَلَيْهِ مَلأٌ مِّن قَوْمِهِ سَخِرُواْ مِنْهُ قَالَ إِن تَسْخَرُواْ مِنَّا فَإِنَّا نَسْخَرُ مِنكُمْ كَمَا تَسْخَرُونَ
And as he was constructing the ship, whenever the chiefs of his people passed by him, they made a mockery of him. He said: “If you mock at us, so do we mock at you likewise for your mocking.

 
{Hud 11:36-38}

[…]
وَقَالَ ارْكَبُواْ فِيهَا بِسْمِ اللَّهِ مَجْرَاهَا وَمُرْسَاهَا إِنَّ رَبِّي لَغَفُورٌ رَّحِيمٌ
And he [Nuh] said: “Embark therein, in the Name of Allaah will be its moving course and its resting anchorage. Surely, my Lord is Oft-Forgiving, Most Merciful.”

 

 

وَهِيَ تَجْرِي بِهِمْ فِي مَوْجٍ كَالْجِبَالِ وَنَادَى نُوحٌ ابْنَهُ وَكَانَ فِي مَعْزِلٍ يَا بُنَيَّ ارْكَب مَّعَنَا وَلاَ تَكُن مَّعَ الْكَافِرِينَ

 

So it (the ship) sailed with them amidst the waves like mountains, and Nuh called out to his son, who had separated himself (apart), “O my son! Embark with us and be not with the disbelievers.”

 
قَالَ سَآوِي إِلَى جَبَلٍ يَعْصِمُنِي مِنَ الْمَاء قَالَ لاَ عَاصِمَ الْيَوْمَ مِنْ أَمْرِ اللَّهِ إِلاَّ مَن رَّحِمَ وَحَالَ بَيْنَهُمَا الْمَوْجُ فَكَانَ مِنَ الْمُغْرَقِينَ
The son replied: “I will betake myself to a mountain, it will save me from the water.” Nuh said: “This day there is no saviour from the Decree of Allaah except him on whom He has mercy.” And a wave came in between them, so he (the son) was among the drowned.

 

{Hud 11:41-43}

Let passion kill you so that you can live

Ideas don’t change the world, people do.

truths

In every culture and institution, in every individual’s mind, there’s the overwhelming and compelling need to be significant in some ways. The idea that once we’re dead, our memories, thoughts,feelings, personality – would disappear forever is frightening and is the driving force behind every action ( and inaction for that matter). Some seek it through fame, others through the notoriety of crimes and bloodshed. That’s why there are prestigious universities like the Ivy League in the US and Oxbridge in the UK. That’s why many parents push their kids to take up violin lessons by age 4, join student organizations, competitions, pageants; they want to be significant through their (hopefully) successful child. They want to be the Parent of THE President, Parent of THE Lawyer, Parent of THE Doctor. That’s why many a young bright minds with fire in their bellies go for the careers with best potential of wielding power over things that matter to them, and create change on a larger scale. The same bright minds find themselves, 10-20 years down the road, overworked,underappreciated,drowning in debt,and with depleted hearts.

Who doesn’t want to be like  Martin Luther King Jr., Nelson Mandela, Nikola Tesla, Albert Einstein? Who doesn’t dream of becoming the next Mark Zuckerberg, or the discoverer of a cure for cancer? What’s happening then? Why is there such a big disparity between what people want and what people become? Why is it that in an age where virtually anything is possible and everything is accessible, more social media apps are created than discussions had on a permanent solution to toxic waste; people focus more on picking out the perfect selfie from the 50 nearly identical selfies they took than they do on corrupt leaders or horrible tragedies, like the drowning of nearly a thousand migrants in the Mediterranean ocean ?

Why is the self-help industry a  multi-billion dollar industry when we feel more lost than ever?

I’ll tell you why: passion can’t be standardized. 

Whoever purports to give you a map to attain your passions, or become who you dreamt of being- they are either fooling you or fooling themselves. People aspire to be just like the prolific giants who went down in history for their achievements,art, and excellence. They want to know how many hours Picasso put in, what books Einstein read, how to follow Zuckerberg’s trajectory and come up with the new Facebook. 10 000 hours or 10 lifetimes won’t get you the answer. YOU hold the answer. Cliché, huh? We do not choose our passions, they choose us. We’re born with that candle waiting to be lit. We stumble across some book, or see some comedian, and voilà! We are burning with passion. But it wasn’t random or because you just happened to come across comedy before chemistry. Passion is a force beyond our comprehension. It can’t be forged nor can it be forced. It’s an intricate part of our being, just like our height or eye colour is an intricate part of our body. It doesn’t need fixing or adjusting. It just needs to be unblocked; unblocked by your fears, and perfectionism, and what-ifs, and shoulds. You need to declutter others projections,perceptions,predictions and pessimism that have accumulated within you over the years, and give your soul space to grow a garden.

Let go so that you can grow.

Mark Zuckerberg, Bill Gates, Albert Einstein,MLK,Gandhi- they didn’t envision, at the onset, that they’d achieve what they did. They just did what they were burning for and that fire of passion purified them and shaped them into their legacies. They didn’t see it coming. But it was within them, just like a tiny seedling that grows into a giant sequoia tree; let yourself grow into you, and stop forcing yourself to become what you’re not!

marisa-lerin-ornaments-19-template-embellishment-shape-commercial-use-copy

Q•U•O•T•E•S

 “If you do follow your bliss you put yourself on a kind of track that has been there all the while, waiting for you, and the life that you ought to be living is the one you are living. Follow your bliss and don’t be afraid, and doors will open where you didn’t know they were going to be.”
― Joseph Campbell

“If you always do what interests you, at least one person is pleased.”
― Katharine Hepburn

“Be who God meant you to be and you will set the world on fire.”
― Catherine of Siena

“Don’t compromise yourself. You’re all you’ve got.”
― Janis Joplin

“It is easy to live for others, everybody does. I call on you to live for yourself.”
― Ralph Waldo Emerson

“Every living organism is fulfilled when it follows the right path for its own nature.”
― Marcus Aurelius

“Let yourself be drawn by the stronger pull of that which you truly love.”
― Rumi

“Most men lead lives of quiet desperation and go to the grave with the song still in them.”
― Henry David Thoreau

“Within you, you will find everything you need to be complete.”
― Bryant McGill

“A musician must make music, an artist must paint, a poet must write, if he is to be ultimately happy. What a man can be, he must be. This need we may call self-actualization.”
― Abraham Maslow

“Find out the reason that commands you to write; see whether it has spread its roots into the very depth of your heart; confess to yourself you would have to die if you were forbidden to write.”
— Rainer Maria Rilke

“Daring ideas are like chessmen moved forward. They may be beaten, but they may start a winning game.”
— Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

“As soon as you trust yourself, you will know how to live.”
— Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

 

 

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