Only Allaah can give me comprehensive safety, which is emotional safety. My mind can only make me safe in terms of what I can see or predict. But the physical threats can’t be compared to metaphysical threats because of the limitations in the density of this physical realm. But the soul and heart can be subjected to unimaginable horrors that are made worse by the lack of knowledge of these hidden realms and what can happen. So instead of trying to at least mitigate the pain, one disconnects and rejects it, pushing heart further into the shadows.
Only Allaah knows what the mind can’t even fathom or put into words. And I rest in that knowing because I know that no matter how much I dissociate and how much sensory indulgence I wedge between me and my awareness, I can’t get away from my soul, ever. Not even through death! Not only that, but in rejecting parts of me I’m overloading the capacity of my mind that can’t do what my heart does. Life becomes unbearable, suffocating, and extremely gloomy..