Allaah is an active listener. He’s present and engaged with whatever you share with Him, even if it’s not articulate or formal. He meets you where you are and aims to connect and not assert. To really get to know Him you have to engage with Him outside the ego, that is beyond your assumptions. Don’t project on Him your limited understanding and hold space in your heart in the most precarious circumstance where your negative beliefs make you run for the hills, in order to usher in a true understanding of why Allaah wills for certain things to happen. Seek Him in your moments of panic, fear, anger, frustration and ask Him to revise your perception and the understanding that is making you feel powerless or hopeless. Don’t take your reality for granted because that’s the same reality that you force on Him because it all boils down to the divine will which created everything. If you say a certain reality is fixed and it is what it is, then you have to complete that trajectory of thought by answering this: why would Allaah author a reality that is limiting and serves the corrupt? That’s not to negate that we live in a corrupt world but it’s because we’ve resigned to the reality propagated through intense fear to lock us in to these mental traps like cattle. When we think those running things are in power when really they are just occupying the void of us abandoning our true power, we’re making mental jumps that land us in the wrong territory. We base our analysis of the world on false equivalents and fallacies taught to us by the corrupt structures.
So are you sure this is what Allaah wants for you? Anything that makes you feel drained, anxious, fearful, powerless, insecure, frustrated, etc., is a clear sign that your soul is rejecting beliefs and a reality that is false!!
Life as He intended it is absolutely meant to be balanced and harmonious and that’s your trail to find your way out of the maze of mentalism.
The Prophet (salAllahu calayhi wa sallam) said
Allaah the Most High said, ‘I am as My servant thinks (expects) I am. I am with him when he mentions Me. If he mentions Me to himself, I mention him to Myself; and if he mentions Me in an assembly, I mention him in an assembly greater than it. If he draws near to Me a hand’s length, I draw near to him an arm’s length. And if he comes to Me walking, I go to him at speed.