I realized that feeling peaceful and still eventually makes me feel restless because it doesn’t seem right that everything is peaceful. It’s like I search for something to control, like pulling threads. And it was then that it hit me; we say we want good but we don’t know HOW to experience and interact with the good life! And it’s not that the good life is over there, it’s actually everywhere, it’s all there is. But we can’t experience it through ego, and if we aren’t grounded in spirit, in being, we can’t receive and absorb the abundance.
The programming of fear and scarcity is really drilled into me. But the good thing is, as soon as these things come to my awareness and I don’t resist them, they dissolve. I can’t become unaware but the willingness must be there.
All these things I discover and write about come to me out of the blue, through me being still and observant of my inner environment. And spirit teaches me. By spirit I mean my soul. It’s like a test to see if I will withstand the initial soul noise to want to deepen into myself. Clarity is never too far away from chaos and noise.