Mata Hari

Toxic femininity is far more damaging and insidious than toxic masculinity and here’s why :

Toxic masculinity manifests in power struggles, domination, destruction of property and structures. Toxic masculinity aims to conquer the environment and subdue people overtly.

Toxic femininity isn’t confrontational nor is it overt. And that’s exactly what makes it so insidious. It’s like inhaling pure nitrogen; it has no smell or taste or colour and you will die without ever feeling like you’re about to die. You just get light-headed and pass out.

Toxic femininity uses manipulation and people pleasing to gain an inverted type of power : emotional vampirism. It’ll hypnotize you with its tactics and guilt-tripping and you won’t know what hit you. And it leaves no proof, no tangible destruction in its wake. Airtight alibi. But you’ll know its presence by how it feels. You feel suffocated, you’ll walk on eggshells, you’ll question yourself a lot, you’ll take responsibility for her feelings, you’ll feel guilty.

Because patriarchy and misogyny gets deflected on a lot, there’s the added danger to assume that women are completely innocent and don’t have their own systematic imbalances. This not only hinders awareness but it prolongs the healing and ensures that we pass on our aggregated inherited toxic to the next generation. And as long as we’re not internally liberated we can’t help liberate and heal the world. No matter what anyone says, this world needs the internal and external balance of masculine and feminine energy. There’s no two ways about it.

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