In over your head

I don’t need to be right. All my progress and growth has been through identifying what I’m doing wrong or what I’m seeing in the wrong way. I don’t want to figure it all out. All I get from that is entangling myself with obsessive thinking and endless rabbit holes that drain my soul.I don’t want to be liked. Lord knows I don’t even like myself most of the time. I just want to surrender to Allaah and His divine mystery, to be saved from the claws and jaws of this insidious matrix that encages the minds that refuse to surrender to their hearts. I don’t need to know, I just want to be able to trust my unique cycle, my peculiar soul patterns, and just flow. I don’t need to know whereto or for how long or what’s going to happen. I want to live as nature and animals do. Perpetually in uncertainty and change, yet completely unfazed, missing not a single beat. I aspire to experience that kind of carefree harmony.

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