In a daze

I’ve hurt myself trying to fulfill the dreams of my soul out in the world. I tried building a ladder to meet the reach of my eyes and I destroyed myself when despite all my efforts I didn’t reach far above the ground, let alone the moon. I blamed myself for not being able to do what only Allaah could do, and I tried to conquer a space in my heart that I was meant to be conquered by in existential cubudiyyah; true servitude in essence. I tried to live in 2 realities so as not to rock the boat, and instead I was torn asunder by the very boat I had protected.

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