It takes a lot of bravery to receive love unconditionally, as you are, with imperfections and insecurities that you believe make you repulsive or unlovable. Making space for your shadow to be loved beside you is one of the strongest things you’ll ever do. It’s hard, especially as a woman. It’s like we’ve cordoned off the part most in need of… most in need of love, light; love from our acceptance, light from our understanding of self. We’ve become so entrenched in our roles as nurturers that we’ve become a thing, separated from the whole, self-destructive almost as a punishment for needing the thing we so compulsively give away.
Catabolic love becomes a form of self-harm when it becomes a hollow receptacle for the antithesis of its essence , like comfort eating for starving the appetite of pain, or cutting to inflict pain in order to numb a different type of pain. It becomes mutated when our ego cuts our soul off the cosmic flow, breaking away from the harmonious cycle designed by the divine.When we defy or ignore our soul signals, we become rogue breakaway cells, cancerous, invasive, killing by refracting the life we were meant to be nourished by. We end up feeding others the starvation we feel, and not the fullness we intend to present.
Everything we touch is a fractal of our soul. Our ego is a hallucination we insist on others seeing. But others can’t see what is void of the divine light, now can they?