Reflecting on my most painful memories, I’m starting to realize that what caused me so much suffering wasn’t what actually happened and it wasn’t the fact that I wished my life had taken a different trajectory. It was that I remained suspended in defiant resistance of what was and rejection of what genuinely sprung up within me in response to external situations. So, I rebelled against the divine plan and I rebelled against my internal experience, but the one thing I did not rebel against and remained loyal to was my destructive thought patterns that insisted safety lay in retaining control of life. All these years, I gave preference to the external realities endorsed by society and all the while my potential lay in divine escrow, awaiting my surrender and receptivity.
Pain is a universal tax collector, the tax being on the misalignment of our inner being.