When we pray istikhaara for a certain prospect, a new job, a potential spouse, a drastic change, we envision that if this thing is good then we’ll get it, and if it’s not good we won’t get it. And if it happens that we feel discouraged after our istikhaara, we conclude that the job or person was bad news basically.
And this is from a very myopic and egocentric pov. Not in a bad way, I mean us humans ARE innately egocentric. But it’s very simplistic.
Consider this: what if the job or the person WAS good and had you proceeded with things, they’d pan out as you envisioned? But the trajectory you thought was good for your future self turned out to be detrimental? Meaning, you got your way but the way lead you away from your self-actualization.
We might pray istikhaara about a decision, feel good about it, proceed with it and we end up in the biggest shitstorm ever! We might feel failed by Allaah or we wonder what we did wrong with the istikhaara – was it wrongly worded or wasn’t it sincere?
Again, we can’t look beyond the current moment. But what if the shitstorm WAS the absolute best thing for your growth and your future self? What if the temporary pain was outweighed many times over by the lasting growth?
In many ways, we use the deen as an escape from ourselves and from facing uncomfortable truths. So instead of seeing Allaah and the deen the way it is, we insist on seeing it the way WE are. So you find endless groups and sects proclaiming THEIR truth. No, the truth is universal. These sects are just manifestations of archetypes. Sorta like how kids group themselves in high school ; the jocks, the nerds, the pranksters , the vapid girls.
You can’t know Allaah before you know yourself. Before you sift through the abyss of billions of thoughts and suppressed feelings and wrong self-beliefs. Before you distance yourself from the automatic impulses and regain the control and ability to become whole – whole as in the integration of your light and dark side.
And that’s the purpose of this world ; self-actualization. Because in self-actualization lies the unadulterated fitrah ( intuition) of Tawheed.
“Be who God meant you to be and you will set the world on fire.”
— Catherine of Siena