There’s power in pain
There’s healing in suffering
I’ve lived my life in hiding, afraid of that pain
So inevitably, I lost my only hope: the power to withstand the convulsions of repressed energy surging through my consciousness, seizing my mind.
I gave up the freedom to endure a bit of death before I could become alive in the truest sense
I was afraid of death so I did not live
I was afraid of the fire, so I never evolved into phoenix
I was afraid of disappointment so I did not hope
I was afraid of rejection so I did not love
I was afraid of tomorrow so I didn’t even get out of bed this morning
I wished the summer could last forever, but of course it couldn’t, so I came to loathe it for its transitory nature
I wished the earth could stop spinning for a while, so I could be still for a little while and find my footing.
The worst feeling of loneliness is when you’re desperately trying to escape pain within yourself and there’s nothing anyone can do. It’s like being burnt alive.
This time I’ll endure the raging fire and let the searching flames find my fears, so I can become whole again.