It’s always darkest after dawn

japaneese

I‘m scared. I remember all the mornings that I woke up with a sense of impending doom, with the feeling of a 1000 wasps droning in my throat, the fear of having yet another breakdown sting me, the pressure to succeed strangling me. I’d die of the anaphylactic shock of having to go but not wanting to. The first rays of the sun would come searching through my window, and caress me as I burst into flames.

The only thing that’d resuscitate me was an excuse to not head out. The only thing that would put out the fire was my duvet.

There was a time that 7 am and I would never be in the same room.

Some are scared of the dark, because of what could hide under the bed or in the closet.

I was scared of the morning because my life was a nightmare that I only found respite from in my dreams.

 

3 responses to It’s always darkest after dawn

  1. vladimirstoic

    Ah… the dreaded morning. A fearful, sun-filled abyss bringing with it the dark despairs of yet another unknown- the future coming to present. Another day.

    Liked by 1 person

Fire away!

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s