Motherhood is a choice, not a chore

Many women have lamented losing themselves in mothering and in being partners. Yet if a woman isn’t ready, at least for a period of her life, to attend to the needs of others, she really isn’t ready for the task of mothering.

There are many legitimate reasons a woman may be unable to fully take on the enormous task of mothering, yet unfortunately women have often not been given (or not felt) a choice about this. Because of either unintentional pregnancy or social expectations , women may slide into motherhood without really choosing it. Often such women have not yet grown into full adults themselves.They are ill equipped for what lies in front of them.

It is not easy to give of yourself if you still have many unmet needs. Yet mothering requires constant giving. A good mother shares the warmth of her body when her child is cold, the milk from her breast when her child needs nourishment. She gives both the unborn child and the nursing child calcium from her bones. This is a very basic level of giving of oneself. No wonder ‘Mother’ is a symbol of sacrifice!

Mommy is what we are made of.


Cori, Jasmin Lee. “Mothering: Mother as the Tree of Life.” The Emotionally Absent Mother: A Guide to Self-healing and Getting the Love You Missed. New York: Experiment, 2010. 24. Print.

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