Hitchhiking through the internet

I returned to Facebook two weeks ago. I first signed up in 2008, a time when there were 100 million active users, as opposed to the 1.2 billion users there are now. Something happened in 2009, because I noticed an explosion of users. It spread like wildfire. Although I tried to adapt, I quickly got overwhelmed and in 2010, I left it.

A HSPs Guide to the Internet?

I returned mainly to keep up with news and follow interesting pages. Prior to this, I had used my sister’s Facebook to check out the pages, but she eventually banned me from it  . From the get-go, I felt uneasy and weird. But I tried to ignore it. I added friends, engaged in chats that fizzled out before too long, and I thought that perhaps I’ve been away for such a long time that I’ve become a real recluse. Perhaps I should push myself a little bit to ‘overcome’ this. Boy was I wrong. I’m an INFJ HSP with bipolar type II and synesthesia and low latent inhibition – those are a lot of words for: super sensitive. I have enough battles to fight and enough stimuli to overcome, and I sure do not need to add social media to my plate. I even had a dream the other night where I wanted to take a shower but couldn’t because dozens of people were watching, no, glaring at me. This obviously signifies how I exposed I feel in real life.

I do this. I forget who I am, I forget my needs and I drown. That’s why I’m grateful for Elaine Aron and her extensive research on HSPs, because I know that this isn’t some ‘weakness’ or maladaptive; trait this is my strength. Because of my sensitivity to my environment, I’m highly empathic, creative, imaginative,intelligent,compassionate,intuitive. I dream regularly and often it’s stuff that come true or insight into people. But this sensitivity has its’ caveat in that I need extensive time to recharge and be in a serene environment away from toxic people. I’m on the verge of deleting my account because  I can’t stand the constant pop-up of the red notification button or the chattering or feeling obliged to reply to everyone in a timely manner.  I’m still on the fence ; what do you think?

Too Much Information

I noticed this information overload. I don’t know what to search for, where to search for it, or how. What’s more is that talks like that of Eli Parisier  makes me feel claustrophobic online. I feel like I’m locked in networks that I didn’t ask for, simply based on what I search for online. I feel like this is Divergent, the movie, where you must choose what to adhere to and then be tossed into the heap you chose. I don’t want to choose anything. I want to cross the networks to discover, to learn. I use Zenmate which is a VPN that encrypts and tunnels my web activity through any of the five locations  that I can choose from. This has helped me a bit in throwing off track the internet sniffer dogs. At any rate, if you feel stuck in this maze and want more autonomy over what you see, then I got some awesome book suggestions. 


 

 

One response to Hitchhiking through the internet

  1. I deleted my FB account a few years ago and have never regretted it. I deleted it after realizing for the umpteenth time that every time I logged in I wondered why I bothered. There was nothing there of value to me. The only reason I even created an account in the first place was in case someone from my past was looking for me (and if fact it did result in reconnecting with an old high school friend and one from college).

    The ‘web has a tremendous amount of value, but it also has a serious downside to beware of! In that sense, it’s like any powerful, useful tool.

    Liked by 1 person

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